It Stops At Me: My Children Have The Normal Family I Always Wanted As A Girl

Alright, let’s go way back. So, I’m from a small town in Eastern North Carolina called Farmville. Typically, when I mention that to people, they always reply, “I thought that was just a Facebook game!” and I reply, “Nope, it’s a real place outside Greenville.” 

Growing up, I always felt different. I mean, I was. I am the daughter of a mother with what I now know to be Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. According to doctors, she’d never have kids, amongst many other limitations. Yet there I was. As a result, I was raised by my great-aunt and her husband. Life was different. I think I was always in my head because I never had the traditional two-parent home or a sibling in the home. 

I was extremely observant and reflective from a very early age. Because I didn’t have the “average” family or “average” upbringing, I was also obsessed with creating my fictional dream life, lived out through my Barbies. I’d watch shows like Saved by the Bell, The Fresh Prince, and Boy Meets World and reenact it with my dolls. Unknowingly, it was shaping me. 

When your home life looks nothing like your peer’s, there’s a real disconnect and yearning for “normalcy.” I found myself being inspired by Lisa Turtle’s love for beauty, Lisa Wilkes’ poise and femininity, and Topanga’s compassion and ability to think beyond the box of her peers. 

Unbeknownst to me then, all those things and more would become my sum. Today, I am a wife and mom of 5, a licensed esthetician, and a mental health advocate.

I met my husband Daniel when I was just 20 years old. You know how they say “When you know, you know”? Well, that was us. After our first time talking on the phone, I knew I wanted to marry this man. We conceived a child almost immediately- That’s another story for another day. So at the tender ages of 20 and 21, we conceived a child. By 23 we were married. I had our 2nd child when I was 24, then twins at 26, and our finale child at 31… Are we doing the math yet? Lol.  Now, we’ve been together for 15 years and married for 12 of those. Anyone married knows not all the years are golden, but if you fight together, the outcome of redemption is always beautiful.

I am so excited to be working in a space with my sister, Kierra, the creator of the gem.  In my posts on Beloved Mama, you’ll never know what to expect, but for me, it is much more than writing fanciful words and stories.  My mission is to cultivate a space of raw authenticity & vulnerability, where we can laugh, cry to snot, or both. Just like the weather, the seasons of life can change without notice.  They can be sunny with a high of 75 one day, and treacherous with high wind gusts and threats of tornadoes the next.  In both, I hope my words in this space breed encouragement and hope.

Let’s grow Mama!!